A Poem: Not a Prayer

Its not a prayer.

Its not words you must repeat
in the right order,
without missing any,
to put your heart right with His.

Its not forgiveness you need.

Although redemption you may ask for,
for salvation from pain
and the confidence
to enter His presence.

But it’s not anything you must do,

or bring –
must plead for,
bargain
or exchange.

It’s not a prayer,

nor a journey,
to a destination,
you might be afraid
to blink and miss.

Sometimes it’s not even an epiphany
or a conversion,

although that might be how
you mark the spot,
where awareness
unfolds like a slow awakening.

It’s not a prayer.

Although prayer is a name for
many things.
And its never crawling on stones
to absolve your transgressions.

For it’s not your sin that separates you

and the great restorer of your soul,
so much as it is perhaps, more
a deeply held fear.
An insistent insecurity.

A question of your value.

A need to be worthy,
of the glorious image
God has made you in.
The resemblance of himself.

No, it’s not a prayer,

so much as a slow understanding.
An ever growing flowering,
a remembrance,
and a knowing.

The one you have searched for,
or may not have known you needed.

The one who has been with you
always,
finds you in that moment
you drop your defences.

The lover of your soul

shows you how all the pieces fit.
How he has been waiting
to complete you,
with a true vision of yourself.

Ana Lisa de Jong
July 2018

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